Deciding that I didn’t measure up started at a very young age. My twin sister and I had matching faces, but this single experience revealed our unique personalities. You may of heard this story before, lucky you, I’m going to tell it again.
My insightful first-grade teacher told our class of six-year-olds to draw the word high. No other instructions were given, creativity on the run. By the time the recess bell rang, the back wall overflowed with drawings in bright oranges and blues, each one pinned to a string that ran the full length of the room.
I never would have known about this story if it weren’t for parent conferences happening just a few weeks later. My mother remembers it clearly—two very different drawings belonging to two very different people.
Brenda drew a skyscraper, strong and stable—dependable in all kinds of weather. I drew a kite, rising and falling. Not steady in the least bit, but fun and joyful and free. My mom started calling me her little kite, especially when I did something extra silly… like flashing my underpants.
Somewhere along the way, I rejected my kite-ness and tried with all my might to be a skyscraper, just like Brenda. She was killing it in every skyscraper way, I got jealous of her accomplishments. I wanted to feel the same success, but kites don’t aim for success.
A kite is all about the journey, the ups and downs, reaching the highest heights and then crashing full force into the dirt. Kites are in it for the ride, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to be a kite. Embracing our true selves requires reflection and surrender.
Did you know that the teutonic meaning of Wendi is wanderer, seeker of truth? And Brenda, you’ll never guess… a fiery hill or flame, a sword-blade. Even our names describe us perfectly, and I don’t have to tell you that my parents didn’t plan it. It’s no wonder I had trouble accepting my flighty tendencies.
It took half a lifetime for me to realize. God didn’t craft me to stand strong swinging a sword, He made me to soar. I wonder if you might be in the same boat—trying to be the person sitting next to you. Remember, the Master Sculptor, made you on purpose and He doesn’t make mistakes. He made you to do what only you can do.
For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.Ephesians 2:10
Find out who you are.
Just. Be. You.
For those of you interested in the Enneagram assessment I mentioned in my live. It might help you understand yourself and why God made you the way He did.