This is Me!
I thought the beach would be bright and sunny. The waves crashing and the gulls flying. But instead, I got stuck in the hail for my Live Video yesterday. My theme for February is love and I thought it would be the best place to share. Usually the beach proclaims love in everything I see and hear and feel on this shoreline. The sand as numerous as His qualities, the waves He has rescued me from, and the brisk air tangling my hair–yet clearing my head.
But yesterday the waves were angry and the wind, biting. And hail. Yes you read that right… HAIL on the Central Coast! This rarely ever happens.
I got in my car and said goodbye on the video and then I realized that sometimes our expectations don’t come through. And yet, when we chase after the dreams God puts in our hearts we are always satisfied.
Thoughts of the Little House episode, “The Odyssey” flooded my mind. If you remember Dhillon is a kid who is dying of leukemia. He has one final wish—to see the Pacific Ocean. He doesn’t care what it takes or even if he dies trying to get there. He has to see it and feel the water on his skin before it’s too late.
Don’t you see Mr. Ingalls—I’m never going to get another chance. I’m running out of time.
–DhillonFrom The Odyssey – Season 5, Episode 24
Do you ever feel that way?
As if you are running out of time?
I knew another young man battling the same illness as Dhillon. He had similar resolve, a mission to accomplish before his last breath. He didn’t know when that would be, but it was soon and he believed God had some things for him to do before that day.
Listening to Clayton, we couldn’t feel sorry for him. He told thousands of people about how he was the lucky one. He knew that after death, he would see Jesus face to face. He wanted his friends to be sure they would too.
You can hear Clayton’s inspirational story here:
As I stared out at the waves thinking about Dhillon and Clayton, I thought about the question Laura asked her pa. “If you only had one month to live, what would you want to do?”
I ask this question to myself, and I ask you.
It’s a hefty question with massive implications. The way we answer changes the trajectory of our lives—or at least it should. We could choose to feel sorry for ourselves and no one would blame us, but the alternative is something breathtaking.
My mom called me the other day. She had just watched a video I posted with all the puppies, and how her little kite was flying again. If you didn’t see my video and hear the story, let me explain.
When I was in kindergarten our teacher asked us to draw the word “high.” My twin sister drew a skyscraper, just like her—strong and determined. I drew a kite, similar to my personality—playful and free. The sad part of the story is that my kite had been grounded for close to twenty-five years.
I’m not sure when it exactly started to change—my kite beginning to take flight again. Definitely after brain surgery. Writing and connecting with all of you may have something to do with it. Being my silly self and not worrying about what you might think of me is a very big deal. The question one more time.
What would I do with only one month to live?
I don’t even have to think about it, it’s as plain as a kite flying in the sky. I’d be who God created me to be. Without excuse or comparing. Without fear of rejection. In freedom and acceptance of myself and all God can do through me. To freely share and not worry that I’m being too serious or too flippant. Too churchy or pushy—heavens I hope not!! Too much or not enough. But just me. Confident to say “This is me!”
And now the question comes to you, what would you do?
One month left on this crazy planet. Your last chance to make your mark, dream your dream, shout your message.
What would it be?